The other day I was talking to a dear friend who has such a great momma’s heart and is eagerly waiting her time to join the motherhood adventure. This particular day she was not feeling well and she was at her nanny job she was expressing to me that she doesn’t know how I do it when I am sick with all my boys. Without thinking I told her that it was a game of mind over matter when it comes to the difficulty of motherhood. Since that conversation I have begun to see the truth in that statement more and more.
Every time I start to get in a mood with my boys God gently (and sometimes not so gently) reminds me that my attitude is my decision and it is my job as the mom to set the tone of my home. When dishes are not getting finished, there is a mess in the den and dinner still needs fixing its my choice to focus on the positive parts of my day, of motherhood. Maybe I didn’t get any of the “things” done but I may have spent time snuggling, reading stories or playing a game with one or all of my boys and as a mom that is something that I have begun to see as extremely valuable, far greater than a clean house.
Last night was a great reminder to wisely choose where I focus. Night is often the hardest place to win at this game for me because I am often exhausted which often leads to feeling overwhelmed and defeated sometimes in a matter of moments. The set up wasn’t pretty; I had just finished feeding my youngest and had settled back into bed when Levi came in needing to use the restroom. Don’t get me wrong I was grateful because that cut down my odds for a wet bed in the morning and honestly I needed to get him something for his cough. When I got up it became apparent Zealand was awake as well. I retrieved what I needed for the cough, started to soothe Zee, tried to quietly answer Levi’s question, fetch water for the both of them and went to find Everest the beloved stuffed husky. My patience began to wear thin and then Levi began to speak of his satan dreams (aka bad dreams). In that moment frustration I had felt fled and I saw an opportunity to remind him that when bad dreams come we can call on Jesus for help. He then asked me to put it on the cross, so I thanked Jesus that he took all the bad in the world on the cross and turned it to good.
I may not love the fact that the opportunity to teach my 2nd born about the power of calling on Jesus came at one in the morning but I do love that he knew that the cross is where everything changes. I love that I was given the opportunity to steer my son towards God. I am grateful that even though I was, and lets be honest am tired, that I get to choose where I focus and I am choosing to focus on the opportunity before me and not all of the negative of my night. I will not allow circumstances to keep me from enjoying my adventure in motherhood. When I start to lose the mind game of motherhood I will choose to refocus on why I do this thing.
An old picture of why I do this motherhood thing, just missing our newest addition.
